your parents love me but you hate me
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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