yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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