OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Green mimosas i think yes
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
