That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
