Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
