How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
