at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize