I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
