Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
