So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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