I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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