normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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