there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
