I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
