So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
