Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
