Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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