oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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