Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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