white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
