Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Randomize