Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
