Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the condom got lost in my hair
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
