Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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