that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
