I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize