i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
