So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
We were destined to go to rehab together
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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