maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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