She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
