He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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