you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
