Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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