And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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