just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
