i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Success! We fucked roommates!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
