this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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