I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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