i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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