If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
