i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Alive.
So much puke
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Randomize
