We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
God I need to hump something, right now.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize