I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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