singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
