Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
she told me i tasted like america
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
