It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
im six kinds of drunk right now
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
