Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Randomize
