Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize