handjob tips. give me some.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
