you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
