I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
So much Jack, so little girl.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
