My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
